Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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men, men like men= men+bed

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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