civil rights

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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what did the drunk man say to the bar tender? Hello good sir. Fine day today isn't it.

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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Did you hear the one about the flying turtle? No? Okay I'll tell you about it. So one day there was a flying turtle. His name was Larry and he was a turtle that can fly. However, nobody believed that Larry can fly and he wanted to prove it. So the next day George, who was a flying octopus, called Jerry on his cell phone and told him a story about a Larry. Jerry, who was a media reporter, was so offended by his story and called the police. Question: What did the police say? Nothing because it was a made up story

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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A Serbian Film

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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