Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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