Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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