Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

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Corn Muffins

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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