Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

Bitch

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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