What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

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What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

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your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

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How does Hitler like his juice? With pulp

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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