"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

So a man walks into a bar, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops