The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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69

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

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Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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9/11

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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