Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Betty. Answer the door!

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...