What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

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A van drives into a car.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops