What rhymes with milk...milf

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

What do you call a black man? Rob

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

What is your name? My name is Jeff

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...