What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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