What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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