whats your budget like? a budget.

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The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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what is almost like Jesus? Jesus

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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