What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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A van drives into a car.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Gay rights.

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Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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