How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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What did the the White blood cell say to the bacteria? Nothing. Its a cell. It goes through phagocytosis.

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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