Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

Good job, son.

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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