What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

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What's even funnier than 24? A clown in a tree.

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops