A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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why does the man appear fat he is

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

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What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

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what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

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Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

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Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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