Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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