Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

Who is Dank? A: Billal

What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

Knock knock It's open, come in

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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