What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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