Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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