If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

an american walks out of a strip club.

Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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