Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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how do you kill a giraffe? you don't.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops