hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

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the WNBA.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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