What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

What does the ice cream man say to the kids? Hey kids want some ice cream?

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

Knock knock knock OCD

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

Every week or so Chuck Norris does his laundry.

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...