How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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knock knock? come in

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

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What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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