hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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