MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Yes

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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