When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

A lysdexic man trys to rite a joek... the people who tried reading it got confused and offered help in rewriting it.

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

whats my name? Matt

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Pickles

really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

Why did the couple stop at the stop sign? Because it's the law.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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