How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

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8

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo Don't worry I'll be there too! Not in the cage But laughing at you! ??

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops