You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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Haha, I get it..

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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hey guys im gay

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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