What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

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What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

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What's green and has wheels? Your mom.

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

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What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops