Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Hello, I am Sergent Henry Orange. I'm afraid your husband was shot down by an enemy aircraft. I'm sorry, he was a brave man.

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There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

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How do you hit a clown off a swing? There are many was of acting upon this situation but the most successful approach would be hitting the clown with a heavy object,

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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A kangeroo is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many waffles does it take to get to the moon? NO, silly. Snakes don't have armpits.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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What is the name of Steven Hawkins condom.... Anti virus

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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A man walks into a bar He says "ow" and promptly sits down and ices the bruise he sustained

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops