Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Dwight Howard

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black man walks out of a police station

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

John lazzaro likes dick

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops