Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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What did the penguin say to the tiger? I'm in the wrong country.

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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Q. What do mummies do when they run out of toilet paper? A. Nothing - they're dead and inanimate.

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

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What's worse than discovering a hornet's nest next to your house? Being raped.

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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