A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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God is real.

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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