A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops