What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

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what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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The Ohio State Buckeyes

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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