Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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12 in general

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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what happened when joey asked the teacher to go to the restroom? The Teacher said "yes you may go to the restroom," not even putting into consideration that joey was a ginger and discriminating him because of it.

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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