You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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A piece of wood walks into a bonfire. Wood can't walk.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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why are balck people black because they are

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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He--Hey guys

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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