Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

guy walks into a bar, ouch

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

Whats 1+1? window!

what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

David Cameron

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

batman farted so hes retarded

A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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