What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

An asian and a black guy walked into a bar. An ambulance rushed to their aid as they were in great pain and had a slight chance of becoming paraplegic.

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

What stops a train? A missile

You're so sweet I have diabetes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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