What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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