"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

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My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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A boy tells his friend a 9/11 joke. The boy's friend says "Don't joke about 9/11, my dad died in it." "I'm sorry I didn't know.", responds the boy. "Yeah, that's the last plane he ever flew"

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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