Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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here's a joke... the american education society

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

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A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

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Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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