How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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