What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

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How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops