Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

Wanna hear a joke? WNBA

Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

Do you play piano? No

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

american idol

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...