Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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ert

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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